:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
