fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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