Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
