you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize
