how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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