garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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