if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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