I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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