Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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