its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
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Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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