Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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