Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I smell stomach acid.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
