Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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