The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
