it was like eating out sand paper
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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