I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I checked into jail on foursquare
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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