your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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