: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
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Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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