I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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