Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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