Taylor Swift is so right about you.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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