I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
