I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
