Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
