I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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