it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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