We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
