Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
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