yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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