Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
