You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
