found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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