im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
should my penis look like a turkey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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