She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
