My brain says no but my pants say off.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
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