One girl and one boy is just not enough.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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