Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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