He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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