At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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