there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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