I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize