the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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