Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
