so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize