The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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