So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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