Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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