I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
