I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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