she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize